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Coroner's Investigator Vincent "Crazylegs" Hirsch is shocked and saddened when the body of his friend Lu arrives at the morgue, a gunshot wound in his chest. Once the investigation begins, Vincent comes face to face with Lu's two Asian girlfriends, Chrissy and Tina. From Chrissy, he learns that Lu was addicted, not to drugs, but to diet soda! Tina, an attorney, tells him that Lu was planning to launch a class-action suit against the soda companies. Supporting this allegation are boxes of papers from a Chinese company found in the trunk of Lu's E-type Jag. Vincent and Chrissy take a quick trip to China to discover that Lu had hired this company to develop an antidote for diet soda. But when they return home with a sample, Vincent is arrested and the evidence is destroyed. Once he makes bail, Vincent breaks the case wide open with the help of a chemist, a mobster from New Jersey, and hard copies of data that mysteriously resurrect themselves... and not a moment too soon!