The Golden Praying Mantis

This is the story of major influences in my life. As time went by, I started having major problems. I was dealing with these problems on my own. There were many obstacles and challenges to overcome. After a few years, things got even more difficult for me. I made mistakes along the way. Eventually I had professional assistance to learn how to manage my life. I took over my life with much seriousness. Thankfully guidance was only necessary for three years. Now that I am in recovery I can look back. I realize what my motivations were. It's clear what were my rationalities. Eventually, I learned how to appropriately rely mostly on my family and peers instead of professional guidance. I found my own way. I decided to give back. I worked helping run a few advocacy nonprofits helping mentally handicapped consumers. I did this for eight years in Madison, Wisconsin. After that I went on to work for handicapped persons living in their homes. I did this also for eight years.My stages of recovery were through dream-state memories of operating rooms and psychiatric wards. All involved were sterile. During stays in the psychiatric ward, nursing and doctor staff were so many people filled with gloom. They also had hope and promise. They all seemed as though they had no clue if I'd recover. I carried this gloom with me for quite a few months. Then all the gloom passed. The memories were processed. I was happy. The sadness of the memories was faced. I no longer had various reoccurring dreams with no conclusion. I was safe. My illness developed so suddenly. I hadn't read about these types of life events. I unfortunately experienced the horror of this situation. I took my problem as a reality in my life. I listened to the doctors so I could get better as best I could. I realized my life as I knew it was gone and not coming back. I was no longer a carefree adolescent. I was hopeful of more therapy progress. I wanted to be actively participating in my new life.