Tam's the Man

Tam Stewart is a circus fan: he's a juggler, tightrope walker and one of the hardest c**** to have ever pounded the pot-holed promenades of Sighthill since he was knee-high to a Rottweiler. Tam has been mentored by Joe Mackenzie, Wester Hailes' foremost drugs baron, and most fully committed psychopath (Joe's affectionate nickname is 'Mack the Knife' - say no more). Now that Joe is "on his way oot" due to a spot of cancer, it's time for Tam to step up to the plate and take over the reins of power. Trouble is, Tam is a sensitive soul and - despite an impressive history of extreme violence, chronic larceny and unabated drug-dealing - he has no desire to inherit Joe's evil crown. Plus, he's just fallen in love with Anna, a beautiful emigre from Poland. Tam's solution to this seemingly intractable problem is to carry out one last massive drug heist, without Joe's consent. Then he's out. Out for good. To amble into the sunset, hand-in-hand, with his true love.What could possibly go wrong?WARNING!If you are the type of person who is offended by bad language and scenes of gratuitous sex and violence, fear not. Although most of the dialogue is in the "earthy" Edinburgh vernacular, it is as pure as the driven f****** snow; and there are only a few instances of explicit sexual acts and blood-drenched brutality (no more than you would normally witness on a Saturday night in Edinburgh's Lothian Road).If you like your humour jet-black, and enjoyed Martin McDonagh's "In Bruges", then you'll love "Tam's the Man".Or you won't.It's up tae f****** you, pal. Know what I mean, eh?