Kids Are Turds

When do you know for sure that youve become a parent? For Jenny Schoberl, it wasnt when a human fell out of her lady parts or the first time her baby said Mama. It was when she found herself, a grown woman, hiding in the bathroom to eat a candy bar, just so she didnt have to share.Parenthood changes peoples lives in horrifying and inevitable ways. No matter how hard you resist, you soon find yourself being that parent far too often to deny it. It wont be long before mom jeans and minivans are calling your name.Discussing bowel movements over dinner? Guilty. Peeing with an audience? Check. Grocery shopping alone? Sounds like a tropical vacation! Watching cartoons hours after the kids have gone to bed? Now your only hobby!What do you do when motherhood turns you into someone you hardly recognize? When you open your mouth and, holy hell, your mother comes out?Kids Are Turds proves that you dont need to be Super-Mom to be a good mom (whatever that is), but you absolutely do need a sense of humor to get through the hard days. Either that, or you can give in, yank up your mom jeans, and rock a mile-long camel toe. So for the love of retinas everywhere, be strong!