How To Get Yourself Out Of Jury Duty

"Yay I just got a summons for jury duty " Said. No One. Ever.Although one can certainly look at jury service as a civic privilege and opportunity to participate in the American judicial system, the fact of the matter is that most of us believe we really have better things to do with our time. Getting a root canal. Watching paint dry. Standing in line at the Department of Motor Vehicles. From the moment that ominous envelope arrives in the mail and up until the time we are solemnly herded into a courtroom, our minds are racing with plans to wriggle out of it. While there are legal disqualifiers for getting dismissed--being a felon, being related to someone in law enforcement, being over the age of 70, being pregnant and dangerously close to popping out a new life--there are also creative excuses, and that's what this book is all about. My sister, Gwen, for instance, is older than I am but has mastered the knack of donning age-inappropriate ensembles. Another time she sported an All-Seeing Eye (fake) tattoo on her forehead. These things haven't stopped her from receiving summons, but she has yet to ever advance beyond a short interview in the jury box.