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From the foreword: My friend Rich wrote a book. Until he did, I wasn't sure he even had a command of the English language, what with him being born in Canada* and all, and the hockey thing. I hear you get hit in the face a lot. So imagine my surprise when he started posting some of these Graham Cracks for his Facebook friends to proofread... and laugh at, and we did. They were genuinely funny. And some of them were both wise and funny. A few were even true and funny, though to protect his pride, I won't tell you which those are. From the time I first met him I recognized that Rich Graham was a unique character: Intelligent, witty, soulful; a deep thinker, a horrible dresser, and the kind of real friend his own friends can count on to come through for them. But to actually sell a book of funny, one has to be creative as well, and damned if he wasn't. I started collecting my favorites from his very first posts, and was amazed at how clever many of them were. Reading them made me realize my friend Rich was practically brilliant; definitely way smarter than he looked. So instead of wincing inwardly when he said he was going to publish them, as one usually does when a friend announces he is about to make a horrible mistake, I was pleased for him and actually thought it was a great idea. So if you don't like this book, it's probably my fault. While I'm being honest, I should also tell you that I think he mostly wrote it to help him pick up girls, and I only agreed to write this foreword so I could get a bunch of free copies to show off to my family. Rich wanted it to be at least 800 words long, but I've run out of things to say, so just buy this book. You won't regret it, especially when you hear laughter coming from your guest bathroom, where you stashed it so your friends could read it while they were otherwise occupied. Karen Horne The Frozen North (Washington State) December, 2014 *As everybody knows, Canadians only speak Canadian. That's sort of like English, only you have to say "eh" after every sentence, and apologize a lot. And some Canadians only speak French. Don't get me started on that.