Free Tp and Frog Cures

FROM THE BOOK

A true story as told by one of my friends about a conversation with her child.

Child: Mom, how do cows get bread?

Mother: Bread? Honey, I don't think cows use bread.

Child: Well, grandpa said that the cows were going to get bread soon.

Mother: Hmm ... I think you need to have grandpa to explain that one to you

***

I am having cod for dinner. Having cod for dinner with Fuzzbutt in the house is a challenge. He sits there and gives me the guilt look. You know the one. It is the same look a woman gives a man when she feels that he has not performed a chore satisfactorily ... He stares me down for fish. I give him some. He inhales it like a Great Dane with a hot dog and then he stares at me again. It makes my dinner so stressful I have to choke down my meal in a hurry just to avoid the look

***

I had to go to the doctor's office the other day for a problematic hemorrhoid. He said, "Well, L.E. you are almost fifty-two and still haven't had a colonoscopy yet We can send you to one guy who can fix both of those issues " Lucky me

"They will band the offending blood vessels down there " he continued as I turned pale. "After that, they will get you set up for your colonoscopy prep and procedure "

The tone of his voice sounded as if I had won a Bahamas cruise or something, but the visions inside of my head suggested horror and agony. He is my ex-wife's doctor too I also suspect he may like her better Did she play a part in this? Are they in cahoots?

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

That's FuzzButt on the cover. He is the resident king of my castle, or so he thinks. He takes over my computer from time to time and tells his version of events. He is not to be trusted Now, as for MY versions of how certain stories take place, they are always one hundred percent factual and accurate. I wouldn't embellish the truth like FuzzButt.

In this latest edition of our lives, you will learn more about me, and FuzzButt, and a few strangers too There are stories to make you laugh, stories to make you cry, and stories to make you wonder. So, enjoy Escape your world for a few minutes and enter mine.

This is L.E. Hewitt's sixth book about life, love, and laughter.

L.E. Hewitt continues to bring us books about the best parts of life. His stories of love, family, and nostalgia often leave the reader to reflect upon their own personal experiences with a smile. Easy to read and loved by many, his collections continue to highlight the best in all of us.

A Pennsylvania native, Hewitt has lived in Indiana for the past several years. He plans to continue to entertain us with his unique brand of humor for many years to come.