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'Fifty Shades of Beige' is my first poetry anthology and, quite possibly, my last. It is a set of poems about life in the retirement years, a subject which has given me much material since I joined the ranks back in 2009. I am indebted to all those who have unwittingly given me inspiration. Names have been necessarily changed in order to avoid legal action. I hope you will enjoy entering a world where health issues are never far away from conversations, where Knit and Natter is dominated by the latter and where once orderly garages are now rammed with offspring's worldly belongings. Where else would you have an anthology featuring dishwashers, bins and Wordle? So, pour yourself a dry sherry, find your slippers and retire to your cosy armchair. You might just manage to read a few poems before 'Tipping Point' comes on.