Conversations with my tortoise

An uninteresting book which merely explains why we cannot detect the dark matter and dark energy in the universe, and makes a few necessary corrections to the Big Bang theory. However it demonstrates how stubborn and argumentative Herman's Tortoises are and thus explains how these reptiles have managed to have themselves declared a protected species. This means that they should not be confined. On the other hand, it is forbidden to throw them out of your yard even if they spend all their time loitering under your large and well-fruiting cherry tree. If you do decide to read this book you should do so under a plain cover, particularly if you have any theoretical physicists among your family or close friends.