(big, fat, totally bonkers) Diary of Pig

I is Pig. This is my diary and I doubts you will believe any of it. In fact, if you is the kind of farmer what finds it hard to believe unbelievable stuff, you should put it down RIGHT NOW. I wouldn't blame you. If I was reading it I would be like, 'Don't be silly! Stuff like this would never happen to a pig, it's totally impossible.' But it's not. Just ask Duck, or Cow, or Ki-Ki, or Rusty. They'd all tell you... It's all 1000% true and 10,000% BONKERS!